


Even A Guy

by cadkitten



Category: Dir en grey
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Cumshot, Explicit Language, F/M, Hand Jobs, M/M, Masturbation, Multi, Oral Sex, Threesome, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-08-27
Updated: 2009-08-27
Packaged: 2017-12-04 01:40:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/705017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cadkitten/pseuds/cadkitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Maybe it never made any sense to anyone else. But to us, it was all that we ever needed. So many nights we had all spent alone on the bus or in one of our hotel rooms, each of us moaning into our drinks over what we'd loved and lost over the years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Even A Guy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fonulyn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fonulyn/gifts).



> For glompalicious: the "you should write" meme.  
> Beta Readers: kawiikyo  
> Song[s]: "Dedication" by Vitas

Die's POV

Maybe it never made any sense to anyone else. But to us, it was all that we ever needed. So many nights we had all spent alone on the bus or in one of our hotel rooms, each of us moaning into our drinks over what we'd loved and lost over the years.

So many people regarded Kyo as being the one who probably never had a relationship in the past. But he was the one who had lost the most out of all of us, the only one to have lost a wife rather than a girlfriend. When I really sat down and thought about it, it made me upset that he had lost basically everything at one point or another and all because of the band itself: love, happiness, money, and almost his life on several occasions.

But then someone once said that you make your own happiness. It was something that no matter what ever befell me, I actually continued to believe in. When someone left me because we were away too often or they said they couldn't trust me, it was their loss, not mine. When someone couldn't look inside me and see the honest, loving man that I am... that was their fault, not mine. Kyo, on the other hand... he felt like it was all his fault. If he'd done this better or that for longer, then maybe it would have all been okay. He dwelt on what I passed by.

And then there's Toshiya. He's probably somewhere between the two of us, his methods closer to my own, but his interior perhaps closer to Kyo's. He told of his past relationships all failing because some stupid fan or other would see him and then make the girl he'd been dating's life miserable. In a way, it figured that he'd just eventually let them go so they could live on in peace and he could sit around and mope for hours on end. He took the pain for himself and that was where I saw the similarity between him and Kyo.

We were a week into the Family Values tour and all I could think about was that I felt absolutely miserable. For once in my life, I'd stopped trying to find that perfect someone and I wasn't even trying to find any ass at all. Instead, I wallowed in my misery, in the fact that no matter how many times I jerked off, it didn't satisfy my needs.

Tonight we sat around the table in the bus, once again sharing our woes. Kyo was telling how lately when he hit on anyone, they thought he was being an asshole and told him off instead of trying to flirt back with him. The image he'd given on stage was slipping into his off-stage persona even though he wasn't the one doing it. Toshiya was just staring into his bottle, not really even paying attention anymore, though he looked vaguely upset.

The hour wore on and I chimed in a few times, letting Kyo know I was listening and how much bullshit I thought the whole ordeal truly was. It was almost one in the morning when Toshiya finally set his bottle down and leaned back in the seat. "Fuck it. Fuck all of it. I don't care who does it anymore. I just want someone to suck my dick."

I stared at him like he'd lost his damn mind, but then snickered softly, thinking he had to be so boozed up he couldn't even think straight by now anyway. Almost offhandedly, I shrugged and responded. "Tell me about it."

It took a minute before Kyo leaned forward on the table, the wood creaking slightly. The look on his face was utterly wicked. "Anyone?"

Toshiya nodded. "Yup. Anyone."

The seat moved slightly as Kyo shifted so he could lean further across the table. "Even... _a guy_?" The way he said it made it clear he wasn't joking, but that he was still somehow teasing Toshiya.

Our bassist narrowed his eyes and then shrugged. "Even a guy. I've heard men do a better job of sucking cock anyway." Seeming satisfied with himself, he settled back against the bench seat and stretched out a bit. Unable to stop myself from checking, I slid my eyes downward. Sure enough, he was pitching a significant tent in his jeans. It became achingly clear to me all of a sudden that there wasn't actually joking going on at the table anymore.

Kyo gave Toshiya a smirk worthy of the Cheshire cat. "Fancy that." His fingers drummed against the table for a moment and then he flat out grinned. "What'll ya give me?"

Even Toshiya looked dumbfounded by that one. It was completely unexpected to say the least and obviously I wasn't the only one who thought so. I expected Toshiya to ask if Kyo was serious, but instead he shrugged and plucked the five-hundred dollar pair of sunglasses he'd bought earlier in the day from his head and pushed them toward Kyo. "I know you wanted them. They're yours if you suck it _and_ swallow."

My jaw seriously must have hit the table because the next thing I knew, Kyo was pushing it back up with two fingers beneath my chin. He smirked at me as he slid under the table, one hand coming dangerously close to my own cock. I gasped, my cheeks heating up just the slightest as he stared up at me from the floor. "One pack of cigarettes, a lighter, and never breathe a word of it to management that you gave them to me... and I'll give you the same."

I couldn't even believe what I was hearing, but something inside me told me to just go for it and not ever look back. Wordlessly, I dug in my pocket, pulling out the fresh pack I'd just put in there earlier along with my favorite Zippo and placed them on the seat beside me.

Smirking, he slid his hand down further grasping my cock though my jeans and making me shudder at the pleasure of someone else's hand doing this to me. His hand stayed where it was, gently massaging while I could hear him opening Toshiya's pants. Toshiya slid down in his seat a bit, his foot bumping mine when he spread his legs. I followed suit, hunching down in the seat until I could mostly see under the table. Our legs touched, trapping Kyo between us and when our vocalist moved back to me, using both hands to undo my jeans, I could clearly see Toshiya's naked cock. A moment later, I got completely distracted when Kyo's fingers found their way around my own straining length, jerking me off.

My hips arched up slightly and a whimpering gasp pulled itself free of my throat. Some part of me entirely stopped caring that it was a man doing this to me. The only thing I could care about at all was how much more I was going to get. My eyelids fluttered closed while his tattooed hand moved solidly over my cock, jerking me off like he meant it. It wasn't long before I could hear sucking sounds. When I opened my eyes, I found his face buried in Toshiya's lap as he sucked him off. I had still honestly thought until that moment that maybe he wouldn't go through with it, that at the last second, he'd chicken out. But then, I should have known. That just wasn't a Kyo thing to do. When Kyo said he'd do something, he'd do it.

My hand moved down, cupping his, moving it to caress over my balls, enjoying the sensation as he fondled them, my own hand falling to the side and grasping the leg of my jeans harshly. Finally, my eyes moved to Toshiya's face, to the way it was contorted in the utmost pleasure, his head lolled back and his eyelashes fluttering against his cheekbones. His Adam's apple stuck out clearly and some part of me just wanted to reach out and trace it with my fingertips. The hand he had gripping the table tightened and he started moving, his hips bucking as he gasped for breath. I knew it wouldn't be long before he came and then Kyo's mouth would be all mine.

When Toshiya shuddered and cried out, his orgasm obviously rushing over him, my own body shook slightly. Kyo's hand tightened on my thigh and I was glad he'd chosen to move it there just a moment before. Looking back down under the table, I could tell Kyo was fighting not to gag while Toshiya abused his mouth in those final moments. When Toshiya finally settled back, Kyo kept his mouth firmly sealed and after a moment I saw him close his eyes and swallow with a clear wince. It was the same look almost every single girlfriend I'd ever had that had gone down on me and let me cum in their mouths had had. I knew then that I would take pity on him and not make him swallow mine.

Reaching for my beer, I drained all of it but the last swallow and then slipped it down under the table and offered it to him. The thing about Kyo is, he doesn't drink. And yet, he took my beer from my hand and gulped down that last bit in record time. I took the bottle back from him and he gave me a grateful look before turning to settle between my legs, facing me. He wet his lips and then leaned forward, tongue flicking out to tease the head of my cock.

I didn't even bother to cover up how it made me feel. A clear gasp left my lips and before I knew it, my hand had settled in his blonde hair, urging him forward just a tiny bit, wordlessly begging for him to give me what I was craving. His hands settled on my thighs as he licked the entirety of my cock, base to tip and back again. A certain gleam settled in his eyes and then he moved down a bit, licking at my balls, sucking one into his mouth and teasing it with his tongue. It was the most amazing thing I'd ever had done to me and every sound that left my mouth reflected that fact.

What seemed like eons later, he moved his mouth to my dick, taking the whole thing in one move, sucking diligently. Chills ran through my body, telling me of how much I was enjoying what he was doing to me. Some part of me was embarrassed, but I was already close by that point. Teasing had always driven me mad and all I could think about was how much I wanted to watch his reaction when I pulled out and came all over his beautiful, swollen lips instead of down his throat.

His hands slid around to grasp my ass, squeezing softly as he bobbed his head over my cock. When I looked down, he was looking up at me, his eyes incredibly dark. In the end, that was what it took to push me over the edge. Just the way he looked up at me, his mouth wrapped around my raging hard-on, cheeks hollowed out from sucking so hard. I felt the first pulse deep inside myself and I finally used the leverage of my hand in his hair, pulling him off my dick before the first spurt landed across the bridge of his nose. All I could do was watch while I emptied my load across that beautiful face of his. By the time I was done, it decorated his nose, mouth, and cheeks, a little having caught in his bangs.

I loosened my hold on him and started fumbling for something to clean him up with. Finally, I found the wad of tissues in my pocket and pulled them out, reaching down and holding the back of his neck with one hand, the other wiping him up. He just waited, looking patiently up at me the entire time.

Once I was done, he motioned for me to move in the seat so my back was against the wall. I did and he crawled up, collecting his things and putting them on the table before moving to lean back against me, between my legs. Without any hesitation at all, he opened his jeans, revealing how hard he was and the fact that the hints of how well-endowed he was had never been a lie. He tugged one of my hands down and placed it over his cock.

I didn't hesitate. There was no reason to. He'd given me so much and all he wanted was a hand job in return. I wasn't about to deny him that much. My own pants were open still and I knew my cock had to be slick against the small of his back, but he didn't seem to care. He just rested his head on my shoulder, his hips arching into my hand as I worked on him.

The bench creaked slightly and the next thing I knew, Toshiya was there, his hand joining mine on Kyo's cock, his mouth traveling over our vocalist's chest, tongue and teeth teasing at his nipples. Kyo was loud... louder than either of us had been. The way he writhed between us and how much he was getting out of just our hands told me just how long it had been for him before this. His hips helped us, thrusting his cock into our hands while his entire body tensed up enough to tremble just slightly. His hands grappled for leverage, pulling and pushing at anything and everything as he lost it. He arched between us, going rigid just before I could feel his cock begin to throb. Warmth flooded over my fingers as I kept right on jerking him off, stretching out his orgasm as long as I could.

When he finally collapsed back against the seat, Toshiya was the first to move away, going to the bathroom and coming back with a couple of wet paper towels for us to use to clean up. Once we'd all cleaned up and gotten back into our proper seats, Kyo lit up and smoked his way through one of my cigarettes, looking more pleased than he had in a long time. Honestly, that could have gone for all of us.

We didn't talk about it, didn't try to reason out why we'd done what we had done. But it wasn't the last time we used the bonds of our friendship to find ourselves a good release on an otherwise bleak night. If anything, it became a sort of ritual between us. And when we were honest with ourselves, it was all we actually needed.

**The End**  



End file.
